


in a voice that came from you and me

by doctoroftime (saltyhealer)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, also john being a good older brother, also presentationplay dirk, also some presentation play roxy, and dirkxroxy on the side, as side characters, genderbends abound
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-03-14
Updated: 2013-03-13
Packaged: 2017-12-05 06:21:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/719852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saltyhealer/pseuds/doctoroftime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jake is a little strange to Jane at first. Not a bad strange that makes her uncomfortable or a strange that makes her want to call the cops or Roxy or spill her drink on him in an effort to excuse her herself but a strange that makes her strangely curious.</p>
            </blockquote>





	in a voice that came from you and me

**Author's Note:**

> written as a gift for a friend

_i – ‘charu’s theme’_

A young woman stands at the street corner attempting to hail a taxi. She’s new to New York, attempting to find her way to her new job and settle in. Her boyfriend is moving boxes, helping her find her city legs. She’s happy to be living closer but misses her sea, not that the Atlantic isn’t beautiful in its own way.

The taxi is cramped and her phone is buzzing with lunch and coffee plans and it seems like she’s been living her life here for years instead of two days. A city looms over her as she descends into the New York rush.

_ii – ‘here it goes again’_

A young man rides through the rush of New York, ever reminded of the crowded streets of New Delhi. He swerves and darts through the streets thick with taxis; his headphones fill his head with sound of his backpack is stuffed with his favourite possessions: sketchbook, camera, coat, snacks, and copy of The Breakfast Club for film emergencies.

As he pulls into the Starbucks, locking his bike and taking the seat off, he sees a young woman emerging from a taxi.  He stops considering travel, for just a moment.

_iii – ‘the king’s speech’_

The young woman arrives at her job interview.  She steps from the taxi after handing over fare (and swearing to take the subway from now on). Her eyes spot a boy across the busy streets before she’s turning, focusing on finding her new place of employ.

She introduces herself as Doctor Jane Crocker, yes related to the baking empire but her cousin, Meenah, is set to take over and Jane is more than content to continue her studies as a paediatrician. They are more than impressed with her record and personality.

They shake hands to seal the deal.

 

_iv – ‘walkie talkie man’_

The young man’s nametag reads Jake English and many of the regulars greet him as such but more usually when he offers a hello he’s met with an order mixed with someone talking on their cellphone. Most would consider it a thankless job but Jake doesn’t mind, he likes looking at people and he would take pictures but that almost got him fired so he settles for just staring.

He’s a natural at this and by midday he’s totally in his groove until he turns to take another order and is met with the woman from the taxi. It isn’t like his whole world stops, more like it slows down and allows him to take her in and gives him just enough of her to feel his heart yearn. 

He hates it when life does that.

_v – ‘when the day met the night’_

Jane is speaking to her best friend as they wait in line. Roxy is thrilled that Jane has moved to her city and babbles on about the best restaurants and the clubs they’ll visit. Jane can’t help but agree, laughing along with her. Her head is somewhere else; resting with lunch she had with Roxy’s brother, Rory, Jane’s boyfriend.

That was the lunch she met Dove.

Her heart is already cracking just a tad. If Jane knows anything it’s to trust her gut but that’s for another time. There’s coffee to be had and as she steps up to the counter, reaching for her wallet, she catches sight of the barista.

She smiles at him, admiring the bright green eyes and offers her order.

He doesn’t move and continues to stare at her. Roxy makes an impatient cough beside her and the barista (Jake, she reads) blinks, lashes covering those beautiful eyes and he clears his throat quickly, fumbling with cups, dropping a few. Jane can’t help but laugh, catching one and handing it back.

When their orders are through, Jake asks the last question as he passes her change.

 

_vi – ‘fell in love with a girl’_

“What’s your name?”

Jake uses the cup as an excuse, felt-tipped pen hovering over it.

“Jane.”

He scribbles it, hesitates, and hides winking smiley on the cardboard he slides around to it keep from burning her hand.

When he passes it to her, she’s gabbling to the blonde again but she takes a moment, their fingers touching, to thank him before drifting off with her friend.

Jake follows them with his eyes and sighs a little as someone asks them where their venti double foam latte is. The man asking has blond hair spiked and pinches Jake’s nose when he doesn’t answer right away.

Dirk Strider is not one to be kept waiting and he wants Jake’s answer about the part tonight asap along with that venti because fucked if he’s going to finish this paper without a serious burst of caffine.

The barista agrees, considers spitting in Dirk’s coffee, but ignores the urge because Dirk is just looking out for him in his own special way.

 

_vii – ‘gotta knock a little harder’_

Jane finds the winky smile when she’s about to throw away her coffee and it slips for a moment. She glances over her shoulder at the barista talking animatedly to a blond.  He chances a look as if fate herself took his fine jaw and turned it so they were face. His cheeks flush and Jane laughs and since this is one of those few times her romantic heart is ahead of her brain, she tucks it away as she agrees to a party that Roxy is hosting.

That night, since Rory is busy, she dresses up for herself and herself alone. It feels nice, to be in the soft blue dress and white cardigan as she navigates the subway for the first time. She draws attention but doesn’t ignore it, Jane is always happy to smile back at anyone who catches her eye, a habit her father instilled in her.

When she arrives into Roxy’s studio apartment, everything is already in swing and Jane blossoms into a beautiful wallflower, sticking to cranberry juice laced with a tinge of vodka to keep an edge.

Roxy is one of Jane’s favourite people in the world. They met in private school and with Jane’s quietness but determination and Roxy’s raw energy and constant need to be evolving they formed a perfect team to balance. Jane never understood where Roxy got all her energy and raw intellect away from but that was before she encountered Roxy’s family.

Roxy’s family comprised of two older brothers and a younger sister and a father Jane could never quite understand but in that, she understood his family. It was different o her smaller unit of older brother and father but Lalonde family dinners became some of her favourites. Amid the sharp wit and biting comments there was a sense of closeness she revelled in.

When they parted ways in college, Jane expected to be forgotten but Roxy continued to surprise her and skyped nearly every day.

And Jane loved her all the more for it.

Her hand stays on her phone as she hopes that Rory will come but he’s working late so instead she joins Roxy and the tall blond she’s talking to/hanging off the arm of. He’s some kind of mechanic she met who fixed Reid’s motorcycle and has been her favourite little speaking puppet for a while now.

Dirk, the speaking puppet, introduces his MIT degree and then his name and Jane can’t help but see the way Roxy admires him and it’s nothing like the way she stared at Meenah or Sollux or Eridan. There is a need and want here.

Jane smiles against her cup just a tad as Dirk moves away to grab someone and Roxy watches him go with a sigh that wasn’t followed by a drink.

And then Jane met Jake.

 

_viii – ‘american days are over’_

Dirk had a funny habit of making Jake’s life anything but normal.

For every night-in Jake wanted, Dirk had a band to see, a record to buy, a party to go to, an art gallery to see, a fashion show to obverse, all underground and off the beaten track of New York. While Jake’s roommate, Karkat, showed him the beaten track of New York from the Empire State to Lady Liberty, Dirk was all the underground.

It was a good balance for Jake and rekindled a creativity in him that his father had done his best to curb into the gentlemanly pursuit of gunmanship. It didn’t stick with Jake and he hide away in sketchbooks. Anthony found these doodles and never spoke of them to his son but when Jake left, he kept a few tucked away in

The blonde’s nonconformist lifestyle, Dirk told Jake one day over a hand rolled cigarette and untouched third beer, originated from his nonconformist family. Hawaiian, no parents, an older sister who doubled as a cop, mother, and guardian, a younger brother who made strange films and an adopted couch surfer whose trust fund led to Dirk to MIT and eventually New York.

Jake was never sure if Dirk was telling him the truth or not.

The first birthday Jake had ended with Dirk passing him a camera, film and an order to bring him some ‘damn good photos’. The next birthday was an old guitar, which Jake was forced to perform with at one of the underground bars.

That was the first time Karkat and Jake ever kissed. Not the last, either, and the guitar led to them in bed together a few times but it was not stable. It ended, amicably, but Jake’s obsession with guitar and pictures continued. Karkat moved onto greater loves and Jake was more than happy with his roommate’s current, and seemingly permanent, engagement with a blind lawyer.

Now if Dirk was to blame for his bohemian leanings and Karkat, Dirk would later claim to be the reason about Jane.

“Jane, this is Jake,” Dirk said, shoving him towards The Girl. “Jane, this is that guitar photographer protégé I was telling-”

The blue eyes stared at him, alight with recognition. “The barista!” She says and Jake is about to disappear from shock and joy as she pulls out the ratty looking cardboard. “You gave me the smiley today, gosh, what a welcome! I hope most New York baristas are that nice.”

Dirk’s smile is accompanied by a shrug. “Jake’s one of a kind. Hey, Rox, mix me something?”

And just like that, Jake is alone with Jane as she holds his wink in her palm.

_ix – ‘i ain’t scared of lightning’_

Jake is a little strange to Jane at first. Not a bad strange that makes her uncomfortable or a strange that makes her want to call the cops or Roxy or spill her drink on him in an effort to excuse her herself but a strange that makes her strangely curious.

He stumbles, fumbles, gathers, falls again, all over words and questions and can’t seem to take his eyes off of her as he pulls at his collar and tries to make conversation. He’s all impressiveness and asking her questions after her hospital, where she’s been and her family.

Before she knows what she’s doing it’s midnight and she’s on Roxy’s patio curled up on a couch with Jake in an armchair nearby listening to him recount stories of his travels from New Delhi to the streets of Toronto.

She looks up as someone says her name, about to share about the lake house she’s so fond of when Rory is standing in the doorway of the patio. Behind him, Jane sees the attractive silhouette of his assistant before she’s engulfed in a hug and kisses. She laughs, a natural reaction, before nudging him away until he sits next to her and she introduces them.

Jane can see Rory’s eyes sizing up Jake as they shake hands and she tells him that Jake is a traveller, child of the wind and her boyfriend seems settled with this answer. They both know Jane’s life has the need to be firm and grounded and Jake will not be that answer.

Within moments, Rory’s confident air is back and he leans against her, arm around her middle, lips occasionally at her neck. Jake does his best to stay on track but Jane knows he’s uncomfortable and before she’s able to excuse them to save him from further discomfort, Rory is excusing himself to find his sister.

Stealing one last kiss from Jane he heads back inside. Jake watches the tense muscles in Jake’s arm relax and smiles at him. She remembers to tell Rory he can drink since they’ll get a taxi home but when she turns her head, her voice disappears.

When Rory thinks Jane isn’t watching, his fingers brush along the inside of Dove’s palm. Her fingers twitch back, pinkies linking for barely a moment.

Jake calls to Jane from far away in the seat right next to her.

“So, the lake house?”

He offers, all warm and earnest smiles. She knows, somewhere in those emerald eyes, he saw the touch of finger on palm. The simple effort of his distraction fills her with emotion and when she tells him about the lake house, she rests her hand on his arm.

For one night, she gets to fall in love, just a little.

She tells him about growing up half in the water with her mother and father and older brother. She tells him about her family and the generations and extra cousins and aunts and uncles. She tells him about her fear of storms and how her mother used to help her overcome them by playing the piano.

Jane’s voice catches a little and Jake is about to say something and she waves a hand. “It’s been forever.” She says.

“Losing someone doesn’t stop hurting just because of time.” Jake says.

She smiles at him and nods. “I do miss her.” It feels good to say that.

They fall into silence after that and turn their heads up to the starless sky. “I think that’s what I miss about travel.” Jake says somewhere to her left. His arm shifts under her hand and she looks down at him while he keeps staring up. “The stars.”

“I miss them, too.”

Jake looks at her, all eyes and long lashes and he takes her hand, hesitates before kissing the back of it as he stands. “New York has a lot of stars,” he says, cheeks pink as he uncurls their fingers. “You just have to know where to look.” He starts away.

“Show me sometime?” She calls to his back.

 

_x – ‘go out and love someone’_

“Definitely.”

Jake is practically sick the next few weeks.

His job is dull and suddenly his world is just one blur of events with pinpricks of stillness. Jane and him continue to meet, sometimes because of Roxy, sometimes because of Dirk, sometimes because of Karkat (Jane’s new favourite nurse at the hospitals) and sometimes on their own when her end of shift catches his or Jake wants to see a new movie at the same time Rory is out on a call with his assistant or in a mood where he simply paints and requires alone-time.

Jane is happy when she’s with him, or so Jake thinks. He’s almost abosopositively certain! Sometimes he catches Roxy and Dirk watching them, Roxy concerned but interested; Dirk casual but alert.

But Jake isn’t sure if he’s in love. Karkat described love to him once in the form of the movie Stardust and it was all the explanation Jake needed. So one day, Jake shows it to Jane. She loves it and within the week she’s reading the novel at her table in Starbucks and Jake takes his break to watch her read the last few pages.

But Jake isn’t sure if he’s in love. He notices things about her, but that could be obsession and maybe he’s just a Se7en waiting to happen but it’s just little things and he’s not writing them down, more just revelling in experiencing them with her.

The way she licks her thumb as she turns a page, always from the top corner. The way her eyes dart over words, blinking at periods. The way her hair gently curls around her glasses (tucked away so she can read). The way she exhales at each page turn. The way her gaze occasionally turns away from story to peer at him. The way she smiles.

He complains to Dirk one day while they sit at the back of their favourite bar and band locale. In the back, a woman sings while her partner accompanies her on the ivory. He’s sick, obsessed, and it’s all because of her. His friend is deeply amused while Jake lists symptoms and Dirk interrupts him with a raised hand.

Instead of passing a gem of advice, Dirk turns to the stage, clapping as the singer bows. Jake huffs, nursing his beer until his friend turns back to him, long fingers lacing so he can rest his chin on them.

“Sounds to me like you’re in love.”

Jake spits out his drink and while he’s dripping beer and embarrassment, Dirk offers a napkin, laughing a little.

“I’m not in love,” Jake said, wiping his jaw and the front of his shirt, huffing a little. Dirk has said some crazy things before but this tops the whole crazy thing pile! Sometimes the blonde just didn’t _understand_. Almost as if he had broadcast this thought, Dirk speaks up.

“Jake you spent the last five minutes talking about Jane,” Dirk says, stealing Jake’s sputtered-into beer and downs it. “You’re in love.”

As his best friend drinks his beer, Jake is hit with a sudden crushingly uplifting feeling. Jake English is in love. He sinks a little. “What am I going to do?”

Dirk shrugs. “Tell her?”

It takes Jake a month to gather the courage. He puts on The Breakfast Club one night when Jane is visiting and Karkat excuses himself three-quarters through, leaving them alone.

Jane falls asleep on the couch on their 34th not date, her head squished against his side and he falls asleep under her. As fate dictated, they’re wrapped up in each other and when Jake wakes up at Jane nudging him awake, sandwiched between him and the couch and she’s talking about breakfast and her plans for the day Jake says something that makes Jane Crocker pause.

 

_xi – ‘wake up dreaming’_

Jane has fallen in love with Jake.

She doesn’t say anything because people like her don’t fall in love with two people and she considers it a passing fantasy because Jake and Rory are so different and she’s just so bored with being second fiddle to Dove that she’s falling for someone else but that can’t be it because Rory loves her and Jane loves him.

This is what she tells her father over the phone, Roxy over lunch, Karkat over their shift, Jake over a movie and herself over and over. Every night she falls asleep alone, she doesn’t tell herself this and instead stares at the wall and lets the truth sink in over her.

It’s these nights she stays up watching movies and calls her brother in tears as she watches another one of Jake’s recommendations because this emotional cheating is killing her and the way Rory isn’t regretting leaving her for Dove is squeezing her heart and someone has to listen to her.

John always listens. That’s the good thing about her older brother. No matter the time and her history and the pranks John and Jane have pulled, he’s always ready to listen to her without her father’s loving bias, without Roxy’s familial loyalties, without Karkat’s need for romantic simplicity, without Jake’s eyes staring at her with his long lashes with all the compassion a boy can offer.

One night she’s suppose to go out with Karkat, since Rory is busy, but the plans fall through and Jane calls her brother once she’s done watching Elementary reruns. Jane tells John about Jake.

Jake is warm sunshine at the lake. He is one of kind, like Dirk told her. Barista is only part of what _is_ Jake. He’s all kindness and naivety but not out of innocence. Jane can feel the oldness of his soul under the childlike wonder of his personality and the mix is thrilling and the opposite of Rory’s smug exterior and immature insides.

The way he draws, tongue stuck out, sketching people and ideas and concepts. His photography, sometimes simple sometimes breath-taking sometimes just a photo. His fingers across the strings of a guitar and the embarrassed flush he gets when Dirk encourages him to sing with his ‘lovely Englishman’s voice’.

Jane eventually drifts into mumbles, flopping over on the couch. She talks about his long lashes and his perfect eyes and his face and the chapped lips and dark skin peppered with stubble and the strong arms with large hands that are delicate and precise. She tells her brother about his vocabulary and the way he talks with his whole body and how he smells like coffee grounds, old leather, and spices.

“Y’know sis,” John says when she pauses to rub at her wet cheeks, “since this guy sounds really great, why don’t you do something about it?”

She lets out a choked laugh. “And just abandon Rory?”

John snorts. “Not like he’s being captain fidelity right now.”

“He’s stable.”

“He’s not. Think about it Jane, he made you move and he’s not even there every night. He’s everything _but_ stable. C’mon, you’re supposed to be the sensible one, not me. We all know he’s bad news…”

Jane grumbled. “He’s a Lalonde.”

She hears her brother sighing on the other side of the line and her gut is grumbling with worry and fate twists Jane’s destiny and the front door opens with Dove and Rory hand-in-hand, hip-to-hip, and lip-to-lip.

There is silence when Dove’s red eyes fix on Jane. A moan when she pulls back and a whispered word. Rory’s head snaps, focuses on Jane.

“John,” Jane breathes, “I-I have to call you back.”

But she doesn’t hang up, simply sets the phone aside and John hears his sister _shout_ at someone before there is the slamming of a front door and quiet sobs that he hasn’t heard since their mother.

So John hangs up so Jane doesn’t hear him planning a trip to New York in the next two days. Instead, she hears the beginnings of a storm drowning out her own sobs.

Lightning strikes and she grabs her phone and hides under her covers, still choking on tears and feelings and silent internal ‘I told you so’s. She doesn’t sleep that night, calls in sick at work and spends the hour of six am to seven am in her shower.

When Jake’s shift starts, she’s at the Starbucks in jeans and sweaters and barely dried hair and takes a double shot espresso and a latte, both venti, and curls up in a corner of the store for a solid three hours.

Sometime around noon, Jake sits across from her, pushing a fresh drink towards her and watches her with emerald eyes. “Long night?” He asks softly.

Jane nods, heat welling in her eyes. “I assume you heard from Dirk who heard from Roxy who heard from _him_?”

“Something like that.”

Jake squeezes her arm, invites her over for the night and she willingly accepts. That night she falls asleep during the dancing montage in The Breakfast Club and wakes up squished to Jake’s chest. Outside she hears the rain and smells the spice and sleep on Jake’s breath when he whispers

 

 

“I love you.”

**Author's Note:**

> The whole presentation play dealio is for a friend, but yeah hopefully it was enjoyable ahaha.


End file.
